Monday, July 4, 2011

You Are So Way Off Base

Wow. I can't believe its been so long since I've posted on my blog. I will definitely try to do better. It's the 4th of July and not one person had a cookout this weekend. What kinda crap is that? What is this world coming to when you can't even scam a free meal on the 4th of July? Geesh.

Yesterday, I was hanging out shopping with a friend of mine who I will refer to as Celestial because her head and ideas are often out there in the clouds somewhere. Anyway, Celestial and I were shopping and she was going on and on about how terrible her daughters boyfriend is. I must admit, the boy is not the most responsible person in the world that is for sure but who really is the best they can be at 20? I mean really. The kid is only 20 so understand that he is young and the person he is now is not the person he will be in 5 or 10 years from now.

With that said, he and her daughter do have a son together that is currently in the hospital fighting for his life because he is a preemie and is only 1.5 lbs. The boyfriend is always at the hospital checking on his son, being there. The kid doesn't have a job right now and he lives with his mother but he is trying to find a job so what more do you want from him? He and his mother are always at the hospital like a dutiful father is supposed to do. What more does she want from him?
Celestial is constantly bashing him and making it increasing difficult for him to be there for his son. I'm not trying to say this kid is perfect and is the greatest thing walking. He has made terrible mistakes and hasn't treated Celestial's daughter with the respect she deserves but again, he is 20 and has a lot of growing up to do.

When I try to tell her this she doesn't want to hear it. She strongly feels he needs to walk away because she thinks it would be the best for the child and I totally think she is wrong. With so many men running as far away from their responsibilities as they can she should be happy that he is trying to be there as a stand up guy.

Celestial grew up without a father so she is jaded and is passing all that baggage onto her daughter and is trying to perpetuate the cycle by having her grandson grow up with out a father. She just can't see what she is doing and I am getting so frustrated with her.

UGH! We are not the same person today that we were when we were 20 so she needs to understand that this kid will grow and change over the years so cut him some slack.



6 People saying stuff:

Jeni said...

If the guy is at least trying to be at the hospital with the baby, that should count for something good about him, for sure! (Lots of guys that age with something like that on their plate would just up and disappear.) And you're so right too that we are far from the person we were 20 years ago today. Thank goodness too for that -at least for me!

Tonya said...

I'm so glad I'm not the same person I was when I was 20! That is such a sad situation. Keep telling your friend what you are telling her and one day she will open her ears.

Stacy said...

Most of us are still clueless at 20 so the fact that the kid is at the hospital trying to be a father, earns him MAJOR freaking points! And just because he might not be the best thing for your friend's daughter, it doesn't mean he won't be a good father. Every kid should have the chance to be with their dad.

Queen-Size funny bone said...

Time changes us all

CC Solomon said...

Seems like she is putting her past hurt off onto this situation and that may not be in the best interest of her daughter or grandchild. Shame

Terri said...

Totally agree with you Tee! She should be supportive of his involvement, especially at this critical time.