Monday, April 7, 2008

I Still Can't Believe This

Ok, so The Analyst has a friend that invited him to visit his church. The Analyst asks if I want to accompany him. I decide to go as I have been very disillusioned with my own church as of late because of some infidelity issues on the part of my paster but that is another blog. *AHEM*

Anyway, while upstairs I reach for my bible and bound the stairs and grab my keys ready to head out the door. This has been my routine for years now when going to church. I keep my bible in my nightstand and grab it when I go to church. I've had the same bible for about 10 years.

So we hop in the car and make our way to the church. As we pull up to the building we realize it's in a pretty seedy area of town and I am not at all that comfortable leaving my car nor is The Analyst. We look at each other, look at the church, look at each other once more, take a deep swallow then head in.

As is my normal routine, I place my bible and purse on the chair next to me (when its vacant). The Analyst spots his friend who then motions for us to move over to where he is seated.

I look to my left and reach for my purse but I see there is no bible. I look around and to my surprise ...no bible.

I then begin to question myself, "Did I even bring the bible into the building?" I could have sworn I had it in my hand. Well, I surely must have left it in my car. No problem. Oh well.

We make it through the service and afterward say our goodbyes. We walk out to the car and I slide into the drivers seat, shut the door, look down between the seats and to my surprise...NO BIBLE.

Ok, where the hell did my bible go people? There was a guy sitting next to the seat where my purse and bible were. Hmmmmm.....

In all the 10 years, I have never had that or any bible come up missing. I'll ask again, where the hell is my bible people?

Needless to say I will never visit that church again.

28 People saying stuff:

Ms.Honey said...

Somebody done bible jacked ya!!! Dang homie

Lys said...

How in the hell can someone get their BIBLE stolen in a daggone CHURCH? Karma's gonna get that person, let me tell ya.

1/3 of what I used to be said...

wow so that person came to church to steal? Interesting...yea Imma need you not to go back there lol

laughingattheslut said...

That's a pretty rare thing, but I have heard of it happening before.

There's totally no point to stealing Bibles. If you don't have one, say so, and someone will get one for you. But you can't have this particular Bible, because it has sentimental value, or because it first belonged to a friend or relative, or because someone has marked a lot of passages or it opens easily to particular places, etc....

Suze's Sass said...

Now that's really bad!!!

B said...

Perhaps Jesus left his bible at home and borrowed yours?

But seriously, who the hell STEALS a BIBLE?!

MysTery said...

Lol. Dang that is messed up.

Cat said...

That's just so wrong!

Karen said...

Talk about the express train to hell. Stealing a Bible in a church??? Wow.

tAnYeTTa said...

Dang, that's messed. LOL ;)

lisa q. said...

whoa! that's the lowest of the freaking low! crazy messed up crap...

durtymo said...

LMBAO@ YOU ASKING..WHERE THE HELL IS MY BIBLE!!!

Ok so he took the Bible and not the purse? I'm confused? Did he think it was his?

I'mma need you to call the church secretary and report the thief of yo Bible. I'm laffin but IT DEFINITELY IS NOT FUNNY!

Craze said...

That is crazy? Who steals a bible from a church?

*~*Cece*~* said...

Oh that man is going to hell! How the hell can you steal IN CHURCH???? Oy.

shorty said...

I can't believe the Analyst is still around and you go places in public with him. LOL.

Vi said...

Oh dear. NOTHINGS sacred!

SSC said...

I can not someone stole a bible at church. People are crazy.

Claudia said...

HOLY Crap! That is Nucking Futs.

Stupid people O_o

imbeingheldhostage said...

Wow-- that's a first. A bible stolen from a church. wow.

CarmenSinCity said...

Um - wow - that's really fucked up!!!

The Ambiguous Blob said...

that is so effed up, but I can't help laughing. People who steal bibles have BIG issues. Big.

Pageant Mom said...

Unbelievable. Obviously someone needs it more than you do.....

Terri said...

that is wayyyyy crazy! I would think the purse is the first thing to go, not the bible. I guess you could look at it like this: maybe he (or she) needed it more than you! hehe

charmcitygirl said...

only in B'more.

MP said...

can you say "where the HELL is my Bible"? LOL Hopefully if I got stolen somebody will read something in it and return it.

Mizrepresent said...

OMG, so sad!

dmarks said...

Biblenappers.

I guess from a Christian point of view, we are not supposed to be upset at all if someone steals it and uses it, especially if they do not have one already.

Boutique Mix Fashion said...

LOL!!! too stunned to laugh :-). Thanks for voting for MiMi. Much love to y'all!!!