Wednesday, April 9, 2008

I Think I am Borderline ADD

I have been doing some real soul searching as of late. Taking a real inventory of my life and the choices I've made.

Reading Karen's blog, I was prompted to go ahead and post this. As I said before, I have been pondering this for awhile, going back and forth on whether or not I should post it then after reading Karen's blog I decided to say "Screw it!" and post.

I have had a really good life. I have been blessed beyond belief. I have had two married parents my entire life that took a real interest in my life. Often times much to my dismay. LOL Although they weren't the deepest or most affectionate of people I always knew they loved me. I'm sure growing up that way has made me leary of getting into deep, relationships with people. There are times I want to get closer to people but something just holds me back. It's like I am unable to give more of myself then I do and don't know how to change that. Weird I know.

Don't get me wrong, I have a few really good friends that I love dearly but still I feel that something is missing in those relationships. I never wanted for anything growing up. Whatever I needed and wanted my parents provided. Even to this day, although I am not rich I am blessed in that if there is something (within reason) I want I can have.

I also thought about things that I am passionate about. Am I passionate about anything? I really don't know. There are organizations I have thought about getting involved in. Projects I wanted to start but for some reason I either am not motivated to get started or I lose interest mid way through so consequently I have all these ideas and projects that I started but never completed.

It led me to ask myself this question, 'Has there been ANYTHING that I have seen to completion?' The more I thought on it the more I realized, I have not completed anything I started and that is a pretty sad commentary.

It further led me to wonder why is it that I can't seem to take hold of a project and see it to completion. I mean sure, at work I start and complete projects all day long because I have to but if my feet aren't held to the fire, why can't I see things through....stay focused?

It got me to thinking that maybe I'm borderline ADD.

Hmmmmm....is anyone else like this? Starts things or has ideas but lack the motivation or focus to see it through? Or is it just me?

22 People saying stuff:

shorty said...

Maybe you have OCD about not finishing things.

Michelle said...

Hi. I'm a lurker. I ready your site everyday and never comment. But I completely understand what you wrote. I think I have all these bright ideas about home decorating, going back to school for my MBA, volunteering etc. and I do NOTHING! I told myself this year would be different! So, I bought the study book for my GMAT's....it's a start!

1/3 of what I used to be said...

lol your not alone. I think I'm scared of the finished feeling like...whats next? Maybe thats ADD I dont know lol

Don said...

I'm like this, sometimes.

I seem to easily lose interest before I even know it.

I just try and force myself to do alot of things which I really do not feel like doing.

That is what works for me.

DraMa said...

I don't think it's ADD... I think it's just a common problem of not finishing what you start.

I do the same thing. I think a lot of people do.

I get these ideas of things I want to do or changes I want to make and I never see them through. They either get to hard or I lose interest or just lose focus.

So, maybe we are all ADD.

minijonb said...

could be. maybe you just need to take a time management class? that would be cheaper and better than drugs.

MP said...

I am relate to looking back and wondering if you have ever actually completed anything. I just had that epiphany today!

Pageant Mom said...

From the mind of a clinically confirmed case of ADHD (with a side of hyperfocus OCD issues) who is also substantially medicated for it as well...

Maybe you just haven't found the right things to finish yet!

I have pursued so many different avenues myself... skiing, barrel racing, singing in nightclubs, working as an aerobic instructor etc.

You could look at it this way: The process of trying to find your passion IS in a way an adventure unto itself... I mean, Once you find the end, what will there be to look forward too?

I too envy those who can find that one thing that they decide they can finish or excel at, but then I think of all the craziness I would have otherwise missed out on. I couldn't imagine that either.

lisa q. said...

ugh...take out the 'borderline' part, you got me...so easily distracted, bouncing from task to task...not pretty!

durtymo said...

I don't think there's anything wrong with you. I think people who set goals and actually complete them are NOT THE NORM.. LOL! I am the queen of all trades and I start mini projects all the time. Do I finish them? Nope! Instead of focusing on finishing stuff, I just try to enjoy the process and learn as I go. It's not always about the finish line.

Craze said...

No, it's not just you. I am the same way. I do finish some projects, but I have at least as many unfinished ones. I don't think it's ADD. I think it's something a lot of women go through. I read Sarah Ban Breathnach book "Something More" and it really shed some light.

Karen said...

I start things and don't finish them all the time. I probably have at least 25 craft projects going on at one time. I have tens of books that I have started and never finished. I always have lofty plans that never seem to amount to anything.

The only thing I ever really finished was my education. Which I guess is a good thing.

And thanks for the shout out. :)

Torrance Stephens bka All-Mi-T said...

what do u think it is that u find missing in the relationships u have?

MysTery said...

Girl you got to pray and ask what is it that you aren't learning so you can get on the good foot and start completing things!
I am sure that all of the things that you have mentioned are all contributing factors. Just pray for guidance and He will show you. Then make an action plan to get those things taken care of so you can start loving and living! ;)

We all go through it girl.

imbeingheldhostage said...

Completely understand. And the older I get, the more introspective I'm becoming-- this year has been the toughest. With depression constantly threatening me, I have desperately tried to think of something I am passionate about to pursue-- nothing. I'm thrilled to think there may be a reason and I'm not just crazy-- it would also explain my school years. Thanks for putting yourself out there like that.

The Ambiguous Blob said...

I think everybody does this, to a point. When it starts (if it hasn't already) seriously interfering with your daily life, you can start to worry and get your brain checked.

Ann(ie) said...

I also think it's a woman thing. We juggle so many balls in the air at any given time that we do lose focus or lose interest or something b/c's more important. Or we're tired and we want to sit our ass on the couch. It helps me to keep a chronic TO DO list. Some of the things on there I partially start or ignore for months and months but them staring me in the face every day helps to keep them on my mind and it nags me a little to get on em.

B said...

I start things all the time and never finish, for one reason or another. Sometimes I just get bored with it or don't like the way it's turning out or whatever.

Joe said...

I think a lot of people are like that, Diva. I often find myself passionate about an idea and then I fail in the execution. I suppose there's a deeper meaning there somewhere, but I prefer to think of myself as easily distracted by shiny objects.

That said, you've been pretty diligent about your blog, so that's something.

Anonymous said...

секс школьниц онлайн http://free-3x.com/ школьники видио порно free-3x.com/ малолетка 18 лет порно видео [url=http://free-3x.com/]free-3x.com[/url]

Anonymous said...

интим гродно
интимные знакомства в казахстане
Секс знакомства в г ижевске
знакомства 14 15 лет москва
знакомства красноярск марианна

http://trugdasertdedrt.com

Anonymous said...

18 летние девчонки http://free-3x.com/ частное порно фото малолеток free-3x.com/ школьницы порно видео [url=http://free-3x.com/]free-3x.com[/url]