Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Oh That Scares Me

When I was very young, maybe 9 or 10 my aunt and her boyfriend took me to see The Exorcist at the movies. I had no idea what we were going to see at the theater I was just happy my aunt and her boyfriend took me out for the day to hang with them.

We get to the theater, we find our seats and the movie eventually starts. I’m watching this young girl on the screen turn from a cute, sweet little girl to a beat up, green, foul mouth, vomit spewing devil and quite frankly it scared the bejeesus out of me.

I watched most of the movie through the cracks of my fingers covering my eyes so that I could be ready at a moments notice to shut those fingers tight if something scary happened.

By the time we left that theater I was a nervous wreck. Every little noise had me jumping out of my skin. I was so unnerved by that movie.

My younger sister and I shared a room so when I finally got home that evening I immediately jumped in her bed and slept with her. The monster might get me and there was no way I was going to sleep in my bed alone that night.

Now, many years later I love horror flicks but there are certain movies I’ll stay away from like The Exorcist, The Omen and others that are similar. Those movies still scare the bejeesus out of me.

I think because the battle between good and evil…..God and the Devil is just too real to me to watch that unfold on a movie screen.

I can watch Jason, Mike Myers or Freddie Kruger because they are not real to me. The whole plot and story line is so far fetched that I can enjoy watching them but some person having demons possess their body is just way too much for me.

So even today, any horror movie I see can not have anything to do with God, or the Devil or folks being possessed or any of that stuff. You’ll see me sitting there with my fingers covering my eyes the whole time jumping at every little thing looking for someone to sleep with that night so the bad monster can’t get me.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Wow! Thanks!

My blogging buddy Suzel's Sass bestowed upon me a great award. I am grateful and honored to say the least.

I am now supposed to pass this friendship award on to 8 people. It is always hard to select only 8 people when I love and feel connected to so many of you.

Those that I don't pass this on to please don't feel I in some way don't enjoy your blog because I most certainly do....especially if you are on my blogroll and I comment on your posts.

“These bloggers are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers. Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award.”

So here goes:

My girl from In The Gutter. I love her stories and pictures. I find myself coming to her blog daily to see what's going on.

My girl Carmen is another one I visit daily. She shares bits of her life that have you captivated. I love when I see a new post appear on nmy blogroll from her.

My girl Trixie is another one. I swear I live vicariously through her. Her shenanigans every weekend are hilarious and can't wait until I'm able to visit England to hang out with her.

My girl at A Change Is Brewing is another blog I read regularly. Her writing and wit have me in stitches.

Next is the classiest blogger I know. My buddy over at Classy Chaos. She is truly the epitome of grace and class and her kids are so adorable!

Next is my girl Tanyetta. She is an amazing mother of the cutest little boy. I have never known anyone that involve their toddler in so many wonderful activities. I think its great.

I can not forget my girl Annie over at Life is short. Partake in Happy Hour. She is funny as all get out and has one of the cutest little boys ever.

Then there is my girl Sandi at Holding Patterns. She is an amazing writer and her stories will have you captivated.

Please go read these people and fall in love like I did.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Who Am I?

Ok, if you ask any of my friends to describe me, a domesticated homebody would not come to mind. There has been a certain shift in the cosmos that has me a litte rattled.

Lately, I've been gathering recipes that I run across and actually cooking them! What in the world!!???!!! I know! This is quite shocking but it gets worse.

My desire to try different recipes has progressed to a point that I've actually purchased a box to place them all in and get this.....I'm even excited about gathering alot more recipes.

What has happened to me???

Thursday, March 19, 2009

I Thought I Was Special

Ladies, if you ever find yourself at BWI airport in Baltimore, MD please beware that there is a serial flirter on the loose.

Last year I had to travel to Massachusetts for business. While at the airport waiting for my flight to board a gentleman (and I use that term loosely) about 20 years my senior approached me and began a conversation. My thoughts the whole time were of begging him to leave me alone. Vanish already! But alas, he never did. He kept assaulting my ears with his incessant incoherent babbling and my nose with his foul breath. Yeah guy, I want you all over me.

Thankfully the time for my plane to board arrived and I was off never to see this person again. Fast forward approximately 10 months or so and a coworker is returning home from a long weekend in Miami (I hate her right now). She begins to tell me about this short, older gentleman with salt and pepper hair that approached her at baggage claim and asks if he could take her out.
Hmmmmm. This is beginning to sound pretty familiar.

Me: Did he give you a plain white card?
Coworker: OMG! He sure did. The plainest card ever.
Me: Is his name Richard?
Coworker: YES!!

Damn Rich, I thought I was special.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Give Me A Call

Forbes Magazine recently published it's list of the 20 richest people in the world.

I'm single, pretty damn cute if I say so myself so I thought I'd peruse this list to see if I can stalk identify any future victims husbands.

Most of them are married which sucks and some others were just too gross to consider waking up next to every morning without barfing.

I did, however, locate one prospect. A Michael Bloomberg. He of course created the financial world's Bloomberg LP.

He's not much to look at but his $16 billion net worth makes me want to give it the old college try. Not to mention that he's 67 and will likely kick the bucket in a few years.

Michael, if you're reading this, I'm divorced, you're divorced, give me a call. Let's make this happen. I love you long time.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

What Were You Thinking?

OK, I am a firm believer in everyone deciding for themselves what they want to do with their bodies. Who are we to decide what is or is not appropriate for someone to do to their body. If you like it I love it.

Plastic surgery is one of those things I am in support of. If you feel a nip here and a tuck there is what you need to make you feel better then by all means go for it. Hell, truth be told if/when I need a little knife action you can bet your ass I'm gonna be front and center on that table screaming, "Come on doc! Let's get to it!!" Some may say it's vain and superficial but so freakin what. Call me a superficial princess diva, and I'll answer "You call me?", I don't care. If it makes the other person feel better about themselves then so be it.

There are, however, people that just take this whole plastic surgery thing to a whole new scary level.

Someone somewhere should have told these people enough is enough!

Joan Rivers BEFORE

Joan Rivers AFTER

Priscilla Presley BEFORE

Priscilla Presley AFTER

Mickey Rourke BEFORE

Mickey Rourke AFTER

Kenny Rogers BEFORE

Kenny Rogers AFTER

Lisa Rinna BEFORE

Lisa Rinna AFTER

Let's not even mention Michael Jackson. Yikes.

Monday, March 9, 2009

I Need Help

Is there a Shopaholics Anonymous out there? If so please direct me to the nearest meeting? My name is Tee and I am a shopaholic.

I spent way more money this weekend shopping then I had planned. I just couldn’t stop myself. I saw…I wanted…I bought.

Budget be damned, I was a woman in a shopping frenzy. Shirts and blouses. A new pair of jeans that cut off my circulation but who cares they are cute. I’ll just unbutton the top button. It’ll be alright. No one will ever know. The price of cuteness is painful people. Stuff for the house.

I think I single handedly brought the country out of recession this weekend.

The president will be so proud of me. My invitation to the White House I’m sure will be in the mail any day now.

Monday, March 2, 2009

I Am A Thief

Ok, I have a confession to make. This is rather difficult for me to admit but I have to get this out.

I love puppies. I really, really do. They melt my heart. I am this close to getting one. See, I have a problem with the feeding and walking part.

Well I stumbled across a blog a long time ago that happens to be extrememly popular. I visit her from time to time. She always has hundreds and I mean ALWAYS has HUNDREDS of comments to her posts. I have no idea how she does it but I want to be like her when I grow up. She's my blogging shero.

Well, I visited her blog today and saw the cutest things ever and I just had to steal them. I HAD TO!!

Dammit why did I have to go visit Pioneer Woman's blog!? How could you not smile and get all gooey when you see these. Now I am all weepy for a puppy. Damn you Pioneer Woman!!