Monday, November 5, 2007

Maybe I'm Wrong In This

I might be wrong in feeling this way but this chick really worked my nerves on Saturday. Ok, let me give you a little background.

My best friend "Stubburn" recently had a baby. The baby was several weeks premature and is still in the NICU as I type this. She had a little boy and the doctor said he will be ready to come home close to Thanksgiving. Her mother, another close friend of hers named AJ and I are throwing her a babyshower this coming Saturday.

The three of us got together to this past Saturday to pruchase items needed for the shower (favors, banners, crep paper, game prizes, etc.). I feel I need to mention that we planned this little outting two weeks prior. On our first stop we all arrive at the check out and get rung up. The cashier upon completion states, "79.45." "Mom" and I reach for our money and I kept watching for AJ to reach for her money as well as this is a joint effort. I kept watching, and watching, and watching. This chick never parted her wallet let alone her lips to give a reason for her not contributing.

Ok......fine. We get to the second place. I am thinking to myself that this chick better come off some money at this next stop or else we are going to have problems.

We all get to the checkout. I pay for my portion and mom pays for hers but again, AJ didn't come off any money. Ok, I'm starting to get pissed. How are you going to co-host a babyshower and not share in the cost? This shit is not free.

I kept my mouth closed but I was tempted to say something. I'm not even finished either. I still need to purchase the food I am going to cook as well as the balloons for the venue (and we will need about 36 of those fuckers), envelopes for the thank you cards and a couple more game prizes.

I should call her behind and tell her to pick them up!

17 People saying stuff:

shorty said...

You could wrap up a box full of the receipts and other charges from expenses and present it to her at the shower for her to open in front of all those other women.

Call her out!

shorty said...

Make sure you attach a thank you card to it, with a bill for that as well : )

CarmenSinCity said...

Oh my god! I would be pissed too! What is she thinking???? How could she not even say anything like "i'm broke this week, but i'll get the next set of stuff or I'll pay your back" - something! To not even mention it is TACKY! I would be pissed too.

*~*Cece*~* said...

I hate people like that!

Yup. If I were you I'd total up what you & your mom have spent so far and ask her for AT LEAST that amount to contribute towards the food!

dc_speaks said...

i think shorty's idea is a classic. Do that. Do that...then tell us all how it went down.

lol...sorry for the frustration, but um...just tell her it's pissing you off and don't let her participate...hell she can't come. I'll call her up for you!

smile!

Betty Boob Hug said...

Oh man you really need to say something to her. She needs to know that your assumption was you were splitting it all three-ways to keep the individual costs down.

Maybe just say to her, "So I'm leaving you to pick up the tab for the food and drinks then?"

Some people aren't really sure what you expect of them, maybe she just hasn't realised she was expected to contribute financially?

Not Fainthearted said...

Direct but gentle conversation is needed ASAP. Could be she's clueless. Could be she talked with "mom" about some financial problem. But you deserve to be clued in.

tAnYeTTa said...

I was ALMOST in a situation very similar to this one. I nipped it in the bud BEFORE hand. Only because I hate mixing friends and family when it comes to money.

You mentioned that you planned the outing 2 weeks prior but, did you discuss ahead of time how everything was going to be handled and paid for?

Not that I'm making excuses for missy or anything but, I've learned that some people need to be told in plain English what their part will be in the entire plan.

I'm sorry you're dealing with this. I wouldn't wait another minute, I would definitely get on the phone and give it to her straight with no chaser.

Good luck. Please! let us know how it all turned out.

lisa q. said...

i'd damn sure send her a bill! the nerve of some people! sheesh!

minijonb said...

personally, i would have said something. but, maybe that's why i don't have any friends anymore!!! j/k

david mcmahon said...

We have a phrase for that here in Oz - ``long pockets, short hands''!

GurlNexxDoor said...

I would tell her, and explain to her that if she didn't contribute, she wouldn't be a co host--She wouldn't get any glory! I hate that shit.

dmarks said...

I like Shorty's idea too. Put her on the spot. "I know you didn't pay for any of this along the way, because you had planned to pay for the whole thing at the end. Here are all the receipts for what we bought. A check would be great? We can split it out later. Thanks, A.J. You are such a great friend."

Karen said...

I hate stuff like that. And I'm always too wimpy to say something. Hope you're braver than I am!

SSC said...

I would call her and thank her for assisting with the shower. I would nicely state that you were a bit taken back the other day when purchasing the baby shower gifts. I would mention that maybe there was a lack of communication.

However it was your impression that everyone was chipping in for this event. I would express that if she is unable to financially if maybe she could assist with cleaning up and setting up, perhaps helping you cook and clean for this event...in so many words to be your bitch before the shower. Have her run errands etc.

Oh and since you are cooking for this shower, so there is no miscommunication how can I get you to cook for mine? Well when I am pregnant I guess, or you could cook for me now, either way is okay for me.

Ms.Lady said...

Damn...I was going to say address it the best way you know how b/c what was her point of being included and going along w/ you and "mom" if she had no intention on helping w/ the purchases?? Did she think y'all needed company?? But what SCC said made much more sense..I guess u do get more w/ sugar than vinegar..lol.

Ann(ie) said...

That gets on my last nerve. When people don't pony up for joint parties!! ugh. She needs to contribute something and you have every right to ask, darlin!