Thursday, October 30, 2008

I'm Going Too!

I was reading a blog buddy’s post today and it got me thinking. No, I’m not going to link back to her blog because I don’t think she’d like that. She’s much more low key then the rest of us.

Anyway, her question today prompted me to write this post. She asked women how they felt about their men frequenting strip clubs. She asked the men if they would have a problem with their woman accompanying them to said strip club or would they prefer to go alone.

Her thought was “I personally think there is nothing wrong with a man going to the strip club… I think it’s nothing more than some up-close and personal fantasy time”

She goes on further to say, “I think that the best thing a woman could do if she has issues with her man going to the strip club is, GOING WITH HIM!”

For me, this is not a cut and dry issue. I used hang out with strippers, both male and female. I dated a male dancer and I had a female dancer as a roommate at one time. I even MC’d a few shows for the girls actually. I would observe how the men interacted with the female dancers.

I have to tell you that for the most part, the guys were pretty respectful and just enjoyed the show and went home.

I have to say that I would not have a problem with my guy going to a strip club/show every now and then as long as he didn’t try to hide that from me. I’m not a prude by any stretch of the imagination.

We’d have problems, however, if he were to lie to me about going and if he went a little to frequent for my liking. Once a month or so I can handle but beyond that I’d begin to think there was a problem.

Hell, I’d even go with him a few times. It could bring a whole new dynamic to the bedroom.

Now I bring this to you my female bloggers, what do you all think about men going to the strip clubs when they have women at home?

Men, how do you feel about bringing your women along?



33 People saying stuff:

Fabulously Broke said...

I don't like it. Point blank. I'd rather not know, and I'd rather he never tell me he went. Esp with a woman at home waiting for him (me). LOL!

Melissa said...

I dated a man for a couple of years who would occasionally go to a strip club. I didn't have a problem with him doing that, I knew he wasn't having sex with the women, he was just looking.

In fact one night I also went to the same strip club (some times they had men there). I went with a group of women to see the men. I have to tell you that the women watching were much more aggressive and bold in their actions with the male dancers. I remember one woman had one of the male dancers pinned up against the wall touching him all over, along with kissing him. The women were noisy too, yelling and screaming while the men on the other side of the room were quiet watching the women dance.

Anyway, to answer your question, no I would not have an issue with my man frequenting a strip club. As long as he wasn't doing it every week!

shorty said...

I agree with you Diva. Once in a while for a special occasion or with a friend for something to do. Not someone to do.

I think if it horns them all up and they come home to me, that can only benefit me.

On the other hand, if you can fulfill your mans fantasies in the first place he might not go.

It also depends on the man, men handle women differently to begin with and if you have a guy who respects you, he will respect your wishes when he goes out.

It's a fine line and you need to be secure with the man and the relationship.

Besides, you can't ever tell anyone what to do.

lisaq said...

I don't think there's a thing wrong with it as long as he's up front about where he is. I've been to the strip club on more than one occasion and completely enjoyed myself. I'd be all about going with my man.

Sandi McBride said...

Ah, I'm sorry Sweetie, I'm open minded and a modern woman (a true 80's Lady as the song goes) but I draw the line at any suggestion that MY MAN would waste time (and lets face it, money) in a strip club...hey, I have shower pole, and while the bones don't work like they once did, they still work...and any dollars that he might want to stuff in the panty line of any other woman is a wasted dollar...I have a panty line, too...he can put his dollars there...just as soon as he finishes the honey do list!
But that is mighty opened minded of you, my friend! But then that's why I come here...because I enjoy your blog!
hugs
Sandi

Terri said...

I'm like you and as long as it didn't become an "addiction" or hidden thing, it's okay. Luckily I haven't had to consider it much since hubs has only been in them a few times (bach parties and such) he actually has a pretty strong feeling about not liking "being arround a bunch of guys with woodies" lol!

B said...

As long as they aren't going in debt and spending a whole paycheck at the club, I'm fine with it. I used to work with all guys and there were a few times where I'd go to the strip club with them. I don't think it's a huge deal. Let's be honest here, if your man wants to check, he will. Doesn't matter if he frequents a SC or not.

laughingattheslut said...

I think that porn and such is something for curious teens and after you grow up and have a real person in your life you shouldn't feel the need for it anymore. And even then a lot of porn gives people the wrong idea of what to expect from their partners.

When I make that noise, it does not mean that I'm having a good time. Get the hell off of me.

I'm against porn and strip clubs and the whole bit in general, (though I would probably have made an exception for some how-to videos I had heard about but never actually found). If it is not a moral issue for the couple in question, and they both like it, then they should go together. If one of them wants to go alone, then there's probably something wrong.

Once I heard a father and daughter talking about going to strip clubs together. That's just wrong.


Oh, you can't see this, but the word verification thing says "inglue"

MP said...

I agree with you but I think once a month is too often to be wasting our money. I have gone with my man and we had a great time. I even squeezed a bootie then we went home and he banged me down lovely! As long as it was done openly and in a social setting then i'd be fine with it. I love strippers and think that there is much to learned in the strip club! lol

TravelDiva said...

LOL at fabulously broke. I agree, I'm not a fan. If he's at a bachelor party and there are strippers--okay. Hey, I'll be at bachelorette parties with strippers. But to just go out to strip clubs alone or with his friends as a hobby? I don't like it.

Slick said...

I already know Trisha's answer...

It's a resounding "HELL NO!"

Neil said...

As some of your readers have mentioned, I think talking about porn is a better and more controversial subject. I think you can make an argument against going to strip clubs just because they are sort of lame, sexist and a waste of money. I actually find them very boring.

However, pornography is widely available for free, and gives the person much greater fantasies of "virtual" cheating on a spouse. Is porn good or bad for a person in a relationship?

Ms. Behaving said...

Call me crazy [if you must] BUT I'd take his desire to go to a strip club as NOT being completely satisfied @ home.

TRANSLATION: I THINK IT'S UNACCEPTABLE!

Joe said...

I've never been a big strip club person myself but I wouldn't have a problem bringing SSC along. I mean, I'd be going home to her anyway so if she wanted to come it would be fine with me.

Karen said...

I like going with my bf actually. And I have no problem with him going alone. It is fun!

Trixie said...

It wouldn't bother me, as long as you say, he only goes occasionally.

(vixenchick) said...

it really isnt a problem for me....i always went to strip clubs with my ex

Princess Extraordinaire said...

I don't think I'd like it at all if he went - I am not cool with it - I gues I am old fasihoned....

LaiLani Ali said...

I guess I could drag a guy along if I was already going to a strip club.

Ms.Honey said...

I dont mind if my honey went to or goes to the strip joint..he comes home to me and the sex might be wayyy better lol...

When me and the girls go I love to go home and relieve some bent up energy

Moe Wanchuk said...

I wish there were strip clubs for women around here. I wouldn't care if she went, as long as when she got home, she'd treat my body like a circus ride

Renaissance Woman said...

Hmmm...I have been to strip clubs with men and women and I think that over all its a great night out. I wouldn't really care if my partner went to a club without me, unless it was frequent or I didn't trust them. I think that if there are trust issues...going to the strip club is just another thing not going to have a positive outcome.

Freckle Face Girl said...

I would not be happy if my husband was a regular at a strip club. I also don't want him to be a regular at a bar. With kids and life, there just isn't time for it. Plus, I want to spend money on better things.

I must say that my husband has gone to a couple of bachelor parties at a strip club and I didn't mind. I think 2 in the 5 years that we've been married.

Torrance Stephens - All-Mi-T said...

i dont go to strip clubs


have a great weekend
BOOOOOOOO

will u be ther in the am?

Shai said...

I agree with you. Now and then is OK. No to going with him. Funny, if it was the other way around a man would say it is gay. LOL.

King of New York Hacks said...

One of the most romantic settings I ever saw was an older couple of about 60 to 70,husband and wife eating dinner in a strip club called Rachels in West Palm Beach Florida. Aside from serving some great steaks and high end food,they said they enjoyed coming in to talk to the young girls hear their crazy stories and have the chance to mingle with young people which was scarce for them, AND strippers LOVED to talk to them and danced for both of them. I think it kept them young in a way.

talesandtallies said...

I won't mind him going as far as its not habitual or something he hides from me... if it doesnt change the nature of our relationship esp. the sex bit, all is fine

Big Pissy said...

I agree with you: once in awhile for a special occasion.

Hell, I'd even go with him once in awhile. ;-)

Thanks for visiting Hell!

Suze said...

I don't mind if my husband goes for a bachelor party or something, but I wouldn't like it if he just went regularly to "view".

KT said...

once a month is too much for me. a couple times a year, i can deal with. and if he wants me to go with even better. but that's it.

Flea said...

I'd rather my husband didn't go at all. And I want to know if he does. I won't hate him or kill him. I just think it's a form of cheating on me, even if he doesn't do anything with one of the girls. Men have enough trouble, visually, without going out of their way to make that visual happen for them with someone other than their spouse.

~nOe~ said...

My husband went to one and lied to me about it.

I don't think I have a problem with him going there once in a while... I know I don't have the body of a stripper and I don't dance... lol... but if he wants to go to have fun and entertain himself, I have no problem.

The real problem comes with the waste of $ and the lying.

He spent $ on a STRIP CLUB! and on top of that, he LIED to me.

I just want to know he's going. That's all. No problem on him going there, I want to know.
I know he won't be cheating (phisically) but I want to know...

Lys said...

OK, this is my opinion. I am fine with it. But the rule is, don't get all pissy if I go to one too (that being seeing a male stripper). Good for the goose; good for the gander, is my thought.

I expect him to be honest and tell me where he's going and I'll be cool with it. Just like I would be upfront with him.