Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Ask Tee

You know what day it is! It's Wednesday so we have another installment of Ask Tee. Feel free to give your insight and thoughts on the readers question or my advice.

Letter #1

Hi Tee,

With Christmas coming I have a dilemma. I have a pretty small family and it was always our tradition to get together for Christmas. Well this year is a little different and we are not really functioning as a family at the moment and to be honest I am not really feeling the whole faking warm feelings to be around my brother and sisters. We haven't really spoken in quite awhile.

Would it be wrong to blow off Christmas? Would it be wrong to just buy my father a present, visit him then leave and not worry about the family gathering or any presents being exchanged? What do you think?


Not feeling the Holidays

My Answer:

Dear Not Feeling The Holidays,

I totally understand where you are coming from. It's wierd that I received this email as I am going through something pretty similar in my own family. The holidays put a lot of stress on people...wondering what they should or should not do. Some feel sad because they don't have a family. This can be a very trying time for many.

Have you tried reaching out to your brother and sisters? Maybe clearing the air between you may make for cozier feelings and a desire for a family gathering. If that is not possible, since I don't really know how deep this riff is between you and your siblings, then maybe foregoing the gathering is the best. If you are not in the family holiday spirit then don't try to fake it. It will be very noticeable and you will be unhappy to boot.

Take this time to perhaps spend with friends or travel to help ease the feelings of angst you may have.

Happy Holidays!

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8 People saying stuff:

Sandi McBride said...

You know I only worry about my own immediate Dad, Mac and the kids...brothers and sisters always tend to go their own ways, as they should...I'd send a lovely card and wish them a Merry Christmas, visit my dad and not worry about what they might be doing...they may have the same worries you do, and in the end, why worry?

Queen-Size funny bone said...

For once I would love to stay home with my kids and not worry about anyone else. P.s. I love the new look.

JStar said...

I agree with your advice Tee...But in this season you could def mend those scars...It could be the best opportunity. I am not sure what happened but it may need to be address either way...If it cant be avoided or worked out, then, yes avoid the situation all together.

Liam said...

I don't want to offend anyone so what I am about to say is just what I would do I'm not sure that my way would be good for everyone.

I believe that Christmas is a time for giving and I don't just mean presents. But of one's self.

I don't think that Christmas is the time to avoid family. For me it's the time I have to put up with my obnoxious uncle who can't stop talking. Because my mother loves him. It is the time I have to put up with Christmas songs all week because my Father loves them.

But it is also the time I know that when they're gone I will always remember with great affection and recall how lucky I was to have them.

The Peach Tart said...

I love Liam's perspective.

Noelle said...

The new site design looks great!

The Dish said...

I understand completely. Instead of dealing with the angst with the in-laws, I am running to my parents. Such a wuss...

Moooooog35 said...

Dear Not Feeling,

You selfish bitch. It's fucking Christmas for Chrissakes.

Suck it up and stop being such a whiner.

You're a woman, right? Like this would be the first time you ever faked anything.

Holidays are meant for being around the ones you love..or like..or maybe even can't frigging stand the sight of because it's what you're SUPPOSED to do. Get over yourself.