Thursday, October 4, 2007

The Ex-husband Files....

I'm not sure if I told you all this before but I was once married. Yep me. My husband was an insecure, insensitive manipulative cheat. (I'll get into all that other stuff later)

On one warm, beautiful, sunny Saturday morning my husband and I were just lounging around in bed trying to wake up and talking. In the midst of our conversation he said something that completely floored me.

He said, "Um, I joined the Navy."

Me: I just looked at him and blinked. "You did what?"

Him: "I joined the Navy the other day."

Oh you know I was out of that bed, hands flailing looking like a crazy woman.

Me: "Excuse me? How the hell can you do something like that without talking to me FIRST!?"

Him: "I've always wanted to join the Navy. This is something I need to do for ME."

Me: "You selfish bastard! It's no longer about just YOU. You have a wife now to think about."

I just could not fathom how a spouse could do something so drastic without discussing it with their mate. It was beyond me. I was livid.

I threw on some clothes and drove all the way to his recruiters office to confront the bastard but when I arrived the lights were on, the door was locked but he would not answer the door. I was hot!

I drove back home to finish having it out with dumbass but he had left. You better believe that he and I argued for weeks after that because what he did was reprehensbile.

His mother told him one time when we were visiting her that, "You better not leave that pretty girl here all by herself. Some man is gonna come and snatch her up." Dumbass just looked at us both, shook his head and looked out the window into the backyard.

A whole lot of drama insued before he left for basic training. I'll let you in on it little by little. Too much for one blog entry.

37 People saying stuff:

Sizzle said...

uh, that's pretty messed up that he'd do that without telling you. wth!?

Terri said...

no freakin way! I would guess that's one of many reasons why he's an ex!

DurtyMo said...


Shai said...

I know that hurt like hell. I have never been married. My ex(child's father) decided to join the Marines with his cousin. It was pure surprise to me cause he did not have interest in the service. He claimed he joined for us(I was pregnant) and that we would be a family. LOL. SMH. 17 years later and we never married and his life has been a bunch of preventable messes. He still thinks going was wise. Not!

dc_speaks said...

huh? im a dude and that's something that i wouldn't do to a brand new girlfriend let alone a wife.

im perplexed at the thought of it.

oh man. sorry you had to experience that but you sure have gotten past that kind of nonsense.

yayyyyyyyyyy for the diva!

qofd said...

He WHAT!?!?! Wow. Just wow.

...and I swear that the line "I need to do this for myself" is one of the most over-used selfish sentences in the English language.

dmarks said...

Not cool to make such a major decision without consulting you first!

It's almost like the kind of thing someone only does when very drunk in the middle of the night... in Las Vegas.

Only they have all-night wedding chapels there, not all-night military recruitment centers.

SSC said...

I can not believe he did that. However I have known some men who joined the USMC, and those recruiters promise you EVERYTHING but the sun. They have a way of making it seem so wonderful and joyous that you would be crazy and unpatriotic if you didn’t. Why do you think we have so many war movies? To instill the fascination on being a soldier. My son on the other hand is not allowed to play with GI JOE toys. His father told him playing with GI JOE will encourage him to join the military and get the GI BILL. I TOLD HIM TO GET THE F*C* out of my house. His father was a Marine. THERE is nothing wrong with it, just don’t encourage my child.

I think you had every right to react. How dare he do that to you without talking to you first.

magnoliapeach said...


Anonymous said...

Diva - im sure thats one of many reasons when hes now an Ex!!!!

Vi vi vi vooom!!!!!!!! said...


I can't say more than...


Erica AP said...

I would be livid. That is so selfish... but I guess that's one of the reasons he's your ex, right?

MysTery said...

Hmmm. Yeah that is messed up. Wonder why you are blogging about it now...did you see him or something? Lol, jk.

Anonymous said...

He didn't deserve you...

CarmenSinCity said...

Holy Shit! What a fucker! He joined the navy and didn't even ask you first? Wow! That is FUCKED UP girl. I can't believe that shit. Glad you got rid of him.

laughingattheslut said...

I bet this is going to be good.

I sure hope we have internet access when we go out of town, cause I do not want to wait two weeks to hear the rest of this one.

Noe said...

question: did you see him recently that made you talk about him?

The Diva's Thoughts said...

For those of you that asked....yep. I saw him recently which brought these thoughts up.

soumynona said...

How long were you married and how long ago did it end? Just curious? There's no timetable for jerk behavior as we are known to exhibit our jerkness at different relationship stages

GurlNexxDoor said...

That is just selfish, and crazy.

I am actually speechless.

Have a good weekend.

Trenting said...

He did wha>>??!!

Awww.. heck no.. not cool.. not at all..

Melissa said...

Wow..I can't even imagine hearing that from my ex-husband's mouth.

lisa q. said...

damn! my ex joined the navy too but at least he discussed it with me first...of course, it was the main reason for our divorce but that's a whole 'nother story! :D

ANO said...

WTF? Did he think you would never find out or that you would be "Aw, that's GREAT honey!" about it? Men are idiots, case closed.

Pageant Mom said...

Wow, that puts my husband's golf habit in total perspective.

I wouldn't have fussed... I would have kicked his er... backside into another time dimension.

Princess Extraordinaire said...

That's quite a little bomb to drop on your wife without teling her first....

Opinionated Diva said...


Can't wait to hear the rest of the story!

dmarks said...

In the navy
Yes, you can sail the seven seas
In the navy
Yes, you can put your mind at ease
In the navy
Come on now, people, make a stand
In the navy, in the navy
Can't you see we need a hand
In the navy
Come on, protect the motherland
In the navy
Come on and join your fellow man
In the navy
Come on people, and make a stand
In the navy, in the navy, in the navy (in the navy)

They want you, they want you
They want you as a new recruit

If you like adventure
Don't you wait to enter
The recruiting office fast
Don't you hesitate
There is no need to wait
They're signing up new seamen fast
Maybe you are too young
To join up today
Bout don't you worry 'bout a thing
For I'm sure there will be
Always a good navy
Protecting the land and sea

JustMeWriting said...

WOW... that's crazy. Girl...I've have lost it too...can't wait to hear the rest of things.

CarmenSinCity said...

Hey diva!

I'm actually reading blogs right now from my parent's house in Severna Park, MD. woo hoo! Next time I'm in town maybe we can meet up. My guess is that you are at work right now since it's Monday morning.

It's cloudy here. Where's the sun dammit?

minijonb said...

i love that comment by his mother. he really was a dumazz.

not fainthearted said...

He decided he didn't want to be married anymore the minute he walked into that recruiting office. A married person just does not do that.

The Ambiguous Blob said...

Oh no he di-int! What a dumb shit- not for joining the Navy but for doing it without talking to his wife about it.

Queen of the Mayhem said...

That is crazy.......I would have killed him!

Sounds like you are better off without him!

Anonymous said...

Wow. I never heard of anything like that. Sounds unstable. I hope you're well out of a situation with someone whose thoughts and actions run along those lines. Wow.

Anonymous said...

Holy crap! Unreal, but there are idiots everywhere.

Ms. Behaving said... that's a HARD SLAP!!!

How could he NOT think to discuss this with you [his wife] FIRST??

Did he NOT take his vows seriously??

I mean...DAMN!!