I know it's been like forever since I've done an Ask Tee segment so I thought it was about time. Here goes:
I am a mother of a very strong willed 13 year old. He doesn't listen to me at all. I'll tell him to do something like take out the trash or clean his room or turn off the TV and he just ignores me as if I am not even standing there.
I try handing down punishments because I know that's what I need to do but I feel so bad that I give in to him and rescind the punishment.
What can I do to get this kid to listen to me?
This is not an unusual complaint from parents. The problem here is that you don't follow through when doling out the punishment so he sees you as a push over. He doesn't see any consequence so he will not change his behavior.
What you need to do is grow a pair and hand out stiff punishments and stick with it. Let him know there are severe consequences if he defies you. If a child realizes that there are no consequences to his bad behavior he has no reason to stop. Be strict and follow through. He'll get the message. It's called tough love for a reason.
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